Someday Very Soon, Life's Little Twinkie Gauge Is Gonna Go Empty

November 16, 2012 - 7:08 PM

In the Hollywood film ‘Zombieland’ it was the zombie apocalypse that decimated the supply of Twinkies, in the real world, it was just the bakers union.

In one of my favorite scenes from "Zombieland" the character Tallahassee risks life and limb to enter a zombie-filled supermarket for the hope of snagging a Twinkie, “There’s a box of Twinkies in that grocery store, not just any box of Twinkies, the last box of Twinkies that anyone will enjoy in the whole universe. Believe it or not Twinkies have an expiration date."

"Someday very soon, life's little Twinkie gauge is gonna go empty.”

Life and limb may not be at risk, but there’s reportedly high priced internet bidding battles for Twinkies now that Hostess brands has announced it’s winding down operations, selling off its assets and laying off most of its 18,500 workforce.

It wasn’t zombies that brought about the last round of the Twinkie delivery trucks. It was the Bakery, Confectionery, Tobacco Workers and Grain Millers International Union. The union initiated a nationwide strike and refused to come to a concession agreement on wage, pension and healthcare with a company struggling with bankruptcy.

“Hostess Brands is unprofitable under its current cost structure, much of which is determined by union wages and pension costs. The offer to the BCTGM included wage, benefit and work rule concessions but also gave Hostess Brands’ 12 unions a 25 percent ownership stake in the company, representation on its Board of Directors and $100 million in reorganized Hostess Brands’ debt,” according to the announcement on the Hostess Brands company website.

According to Associated Press reports, union business agent Wedrick Hollingsworth said, he'd prefer to see Hostess sold.

"It's definitely got to be better than what this company's trying to implement. There are other bakeries out there looking to purchase some of these locations. These employees have the opportunity to go back in (under a new owner)."

It seems like the bakers union is hedging its bets that the new companies that may rise from the death of Hostess will offer something better. It’s like taking a page out of a zombie survival guide, “Organize before they rise."